TRANSMISSION – ACCEPTANCE
The basis of the relationship is the balance of giving and acceptance, otherwise it will be a parent-child relationship.
The man gives, the woman accepts
The woman, while accepting, changes and transforms. The aggressive power of the man is transformed into a pleasure by gentle reception, and the received seed is transformed into a new life. In the end, you give back many times what you got, but you can only give back what you accepted.
The woman herself cannot be outpouring, so for her, acceptance is the first step. (See dynamics between chakras: energy flows from a man’s first chakra to a woman’s first chakra, from there ascends to a woman’s second chakra, and flows into a man’s second chakra, and so on.)
The man can only reap the fruits of what he has previously given. What the man can offer must be taken over by the woman, transformed so that the man will be able to accept it from him by transformation.
Men need to learn to give, and then they get everything, many times what they gave.
It makes a woman grow if you give it to her. If you give it your all.
When the man gives his seed and the woman receives it, the woman becomes a woman, otherwise she remains a miss.
The man weakens the relationship if he does not give unconditionally. And a woman weakens it if she doesn’t accept it unconditionally. In times of crisis, let us ask ourselves: Am I giving enough? Am I accepting enough?
The primary giving and receiving is the transmission of life, which is the natural purpose of the relationship. If one of the two of them does not want a child, refuses to give or accept, the relationship is broken.
But in the event that one party is infertile and the other accepts this, and the infertile party values this as a special gift, the relationship is not damaged.
Even after an abortion, the couple splits up because the law of acceptance and acceptance has been violated.
It’s important in the relationship that the man feels the need, maybe that’s the most important thing. If he doesn’t feel it, he goes and looks for someone for whom he is indispensable.
Many women are offended that her husband doesn’t figure out her hidden desires compared to an excellent mind reader, even though she should simply say, give her a task. This would make the man feel important and useful and have the opportunity to give, which is the main aspect of his being. And if you give, the woman must accept it with respect.
Abortion is usually experienced as a serious sin. Often a so-called criminalization process in the couple. For example, none of them thrive or their relationships fail. But this does not estimate the fate of the child, and it is bad for him.
Dissolution occurs when the child is willing to be seen and embraced into their hearts by their parents when they find a good place in their souls.
In the statement, both parents (especially the mother) and the child feel bad until this happens.
Spiritual peace comes from acknowledging and embracing reality here as well. From here, the child’s father also belongs to the woman’s family.
THE ETERNAL “LOVER” – LOVE TRIANGLE
The eternal lover who always gets involved in relationships where he can be the third character next to the couple. In the background is a child hiding between a mother and a father, secretly applying for a place next to the father. Of course, his efforts are doomed to failure. She wants constant confirmation from men that she is a woman, a good woman, an interesting seducer. The moment things get serious, the relationship would move on, the man would take over and marry, and even want a child from him, the person would become uninterested in the “lover” and move on.
The dissolution is brought about when the “lover” turns to her mother, accepts her mother and the other representatives of the female branch. Then the flow of love will begin in her, she will be in harmony with her femininity, and she will be able to be a woman for a man.
But how does a lover get into the couple’s space? Very often, we could say without exception, he represents someone who has not been given his rightful place in that party’s system. It could be an unborn twin, a dead brother, a previous important mother / father relationship, an aborted child, and we could list more. Here, too, let us not forget the basic question of the constellation: who is missing or who is not in place.
THE INTERRUPTED APPROACH
We mentioned the important role of the childhood relationship with the mother in the formation and flow of relationships.
When some reason interrupts a child’s approach to parents, especially the mother, an extremely strong fear can develop towards intimacy and sexuality.
For example, in the case of
• the child has been separated from the parents;
• has been hospitalized without the presence of a parent;
• the parent has enforced hard parenting principles;
• the parent has died or been away for a long time;
• the parent was an alcoholic;
• the parent was ill;
The childhood block can lead to the following belief systems:
o “I will never ask for anything in my life again.” ,
o “I will never show my feelings.”
o “I will never be weak again.”
For example, if a baby has to be left alone in a hospital for medical treatment, a sense of fear may develop later when it comes close to someone. The closer the relationship would be, the more inexplicable it is, the greater the fear.
Memories of hospital rupture unconsciously surface. He responds with similar feelings (anger, rage, despair, grief) that he felt at the time. Dormant memories can also be expressed in the form of physical symptoms (headache, tension, stomach ache, dizziness, etc.)
Stakeholders on the surface usually do not want a close relationship with their parent, whom they could not approach. They often claim that they feel nothing about the parent, talk about it in a derogatory way, break off contact with it. This “lack of feeling” protects you from acknowledging the pain, which, however, actually means stifling deep-seated anger.
Death, or a long period of separation, can also provoke anger from the child to the parent. But having a bond with love in the depths of his soul, he leaves no room for anger, which is transformed into fear through repression. She is afraid of anger and its consequences, so she feels fear.
When the person concerned meets a representative of the other sex, these relationships are already burdened by these fears and unconscious vows made in the past, so the other party does not have too many chances in the relationship.
To resolve, we need to find back to the event that interrupted the approach to the parent. The representative of the parent then holds the person firmly in place until the love transformed into anger, resentment, or other feeling returns and can flow freely to the father or mother again.
Children who have experienced sexual violence or severe physical abuse, or who have been forced to watch some horrific event, also often feel fear or panic when they come close to a relationship, which can be not only a relationship but also a friendship, work relationship, or even this is also true for concepts such as success, happiness, wealth, health, and so on.
It is not surprising that they also experience strong fears and anxieties in connection with sexuality.
Exercise: Give him your little finger. Says the other: I accept your finger and the whole hand. – replacement
BREAKING AND DIVORCE
Divorce is always a painful experience, we have to surrender to it, otherwise it gets stuck in us and prevents us from completely surrendering to our later relationship. In divorce, the dream of living together dies, so it hurts so much.
Mostly, relationships, marriages break up because of unconscious hidden dynamics and fates, not because either party is at fault.
Whatever the reason, it helps to take a look at the beginning of a relationship and the good times we’ve spent together, and then say it’s over. One word, “Damage,” is often enough to resolve. It is important for both parties to appreciate everything they have received and to assume 50% responsibility for the deterioration of the relationship and leave the other half to their partner.
After the divorce, the attachment does not disappear, although in another form, it persists. A divorced person will be free and able to have a new relationship if he or she acknowledges the old bond, such as, “You are my first wife, and you always will be.” In the new relationship, the new couple must also recognize the old partner, for example, “I respect my husband’s first wife.”
SHIFT, DOUBLE SHIFT
This is not about someone taking over the fate of a previously excommunicated person, but about taking over the unexpressed feelings of a previously lived person and incorporating this into their own lives.
The person (out of love) takes over something that is not his, thus alienating himself. (e.g. my mother was afraid my father would die.)
If this inherited fear is directed at that person’s father, (i.e., if I am also afraid that father will die), we can speak of a one-off shift.
But since the emotion inherited (in this case, fear) is not conscious, the person seeks for himself an “object,” that is, a person to whom he can project it. So she looks at her own husband as if she is about to die. This is a double shift.
Another example: Dad found a new love, even took the new lady on a family vacation, and Mom assisted with a smile instead of cutting plates to the ground and scratching both eyes, expressing her anger and frustration (it’s a bit of an exaggeration, but about suffocated pain of this caliber). The mother’s daughter then takes over this anger, frustration, and pours it on her own husband, taking revenge on her as if she were the perpetrator, though innocent, and doesn’t understand the whole situation.
So in this case, the person of both the doer and the sufferer shifts. This is because deep down there is loyalty to both parents (“I feel like a mother, but I love a father too, I don’t mind, I’m looking for someone else instead”).
PRACTICE: Setting up the (female) maternal branch / (male) paternal branch